Be a Better You in 365 Days Challenge – Day 46 When To Let Go…

This is Day 46 of How to Be a Better Person in 365 Days (365 Challenge) October 2011 Challenge. View list of tasks: 365 Challenge Overview

Hi All! Welcome to Day 46 of the 365 Challenge!

While we can address our annoyances by eliminating the external source, the relief we get is temporary, because the issue isn’t with the external world, but with ourselves. By understanding the origin of these annoyances (inside us), we can gain more insights about ourselves, and at the same time address the root cause of the issues. So day brings us to getting it go…

Day 46 – Letting Go

Today’s task will take about 30 minutes.

s there anything you are holding on to from the past? Something that happened long ago, but somehow continues to replay in your mind even today?

Letting go – It’s the act of releasing something we are hanging on to. Letting go is important as it helps us to create a better future – a future which we seek to have one day.

Despite that, many of us refuse to let go of the unhappy past of yester-years. We hold on to the unhappy memories, grievances, pains and regrets that are long over, and punish ourselves by replaying them over and over again in our minds. We weigh ourselves down with baggage built up from past encounters; baggage we cling on to ever so tightly. We mull over things that happened long ago – things which we cannot even change anymore.

How can one tell when there’s something he/she has not let go yet? Below are some clear signs:

  1. When the situation replays in your mind again and again – even though it’s long over
  2. When you keep bringing it up in unrelated conversations with others
  3. When you always find some way to link what you are doing with what happened
  4. When you still feel bothered by it today
  5. When you experience some form of regret, grievance, or lingering doubt about what happened

As I mentioned above, it’s important to let go, because letting go allows us to move on to a better future. When you hold on to your past, it’s like dragging carcasses around in your wake. Carcasses, full of filth and stench, that can be picked up from a full mile away. By holding on to these carcasses, you get pulled back by a lot of dead weight, which in turn prevents you from living to your truest self and living every day to your fullest. This prevents you from receiving new things into your life.

Today’s task is to let go of something from your past.

Your Task: Letting Go

  1. What is one thing/incident from your past that bothers you today?
    • What is something that often resurfaces in your memory? Something that irks you from time to time? Something that would (at times) make you feel bad (about yourself) whenever the memory resurfaces?
    • It can be something that happened long ago in your childhood or something that just took place recently.
    • It can be a one-off incident, a series of events, or an entire phase in your life.
  2. Write down what bothers you about this thing/incident.
    • Come up with an entire list of reasons. The more, the better.
    • The objective here is to empty out your grievances via brain dumping. The reason why #1 keeps resurfacing in your mind even today is because you never got to address your grievances when the situation first occurred in the past. So the more you can dump out your frustrations now, the better.
    • Keep writing until you attain a new level of clarity and calmness on the situation.
  3. Looking at your answers in #2, what do you think is/are the real reason(s) you haven’t been able to let go to date?
    • What are the answers that jump out at you? These would provide some clues as to what has been holding you back.
  4. What do you plan to do about this moving forward?
    • Create your action steps to address the root causes in #3.

Notice that we are addressing the issue by (1) first emptying our grievances (2) sieving through our thoughts, one by one (3) creating our action steps to move forward. Letting go isn’t about making yourself forget something forcefully – it’s about understanding the root of the problem and addressing that with delicate care and attention, after which it’ll then slowly disintegrate as you work your way through the core.

Day 46 Reflection for 365 Challenge

  1. Is there anything you learned today?
  2. If so, what is it? Write it down.

Share Your Answers!

What is something from your past that still bothers you today? What’s bothering you about this thing/situation? What do you think are the real reasons why you haven’t been able to let go? And what can you do about this moving forward?

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6 thoughts on “Be a Better You in 365 Days Challenge – Day 46 When To Let Go…

  1. Dear, sweet, Ezzy,
    the only dimension of life where we can be and there is not the past that no longer exists, is not the future of which we know nothing, but it is the Present!.
    Staying in the present moment means being with all the feelings that come from my body, listen to what comes from what surrounds me! If I actually live in the Now, I’m really living my life!
    Emotions, feelings come and go, but do not disturb my soul, my heart!.
    Because I live them and let them go at that moment, followed by another moment where I will try other different emotions and feelings!.
    The difficulty lies in not being drawn from the past or attracted by the future!.
    If my attention will train and live the moment I live my life, I will be clear, nothing I can trample!.
    A abbbraccio and a kiss
    Ezzy my sweetness:)

    1. Dearest Claudo,

      Thank you for your beautiful poem and comments!

      I love how you describe emotions and living in the moment only to let them be as they are. And when its time to move on, we let me flee. Your poem is a great reminder to live the moment, the present and be grateful what we have and share our blessings onto others.

      All the Best,
      Ezzy &hearts ♥

  2. Letting go is something that I have struggled with most of my life – I’ve actually ONLY managed to get it RIGHT during the past 6 months. Thanks for this brilliant post – I’m going to share it on my blog. I will link back to you.
    Ilse xx

    1. Hi Ilse,
      Thank you for your insightful and honest comments!

      Absolutely, you are welcome to share it and I appreciate the link back. Awesome! 😉

      I believe ‘letting go’ is one of the hardest struggles us beings go through. It took me most of my life to let go of a few things that still keep me back from my real self. But such is life. We can choose to hold onto it as a reminder or we can move on and learn from past mistakes or past transgressions. Whatever, it maybe… Letting go helps us become better individuals, allows us to grow and blossom into the person where are meant to be. Ilse I am so proud of you for letting go and moving on with life. It must of been hard for you especially if you have struggled with this for a long time.

      Congratulations honey! You deserve it because you are special and a beautiful soul. 🙂

      All the Best,
      ♥ Ezzy ♥

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